Caligonous
I sat still.
The room was filled with chatter and cheery.
Their laughter intertwined with the music.
Their smiles gleam.
A room full of people, wall to wall.
I sat very still.
News of a baby,
A promotion waits,
A housewarming,
A couple's engagement,
I knew I had to Fake a smile or two.
In a room full of people,
I sat very still.
I've never been this alone.
Never been this lonely.
Coldness crawled from my back,
Then slowly, ever so slowly into my heart.
Time stood still.
I remembered what you did.
Like a broken record
Over and over again,
It played inside my head
As I stared blankly.
I bit down my lip.
To try.
To keep tears from falling,
To keep my heart from hurting,
To keep everything inside.
As I watch them smile back at me
Another fake smile,
A pretend laughter.
How much longer?
How many more?
Until I can go back
To that place where you left me.
Darkness,
That familiar place.
Darkness,
That place in between
Where memories of you and me exist.
The only place left for you and me.
written by: Scenecaster
There is simplicity in her words that reveals the depth of her emotions. She writes as one would recall a memory; vivid, personal but undeniably relatable. She's half–Korean and a half–Filipino, who writes to preserve an impression, cherished or not because she understands that an experience of downpour is needed to appreciate the sunlight.
Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishings.
An unscathed heart is a useless heart. For it doesn't understand love, not yet. We grow not from the comfort but from pain. We gulp down courage because we fear. When the people we love leave us or hurt us in ways we can never be put back to the way we were, I no longer harbor hate. I let it crush my soul and from that, I rebuild the pieces of me; with wisdom for stronger bonds and forgiving hands. Because nobody grows without pain and nobody loves without getting hurt. And failures are lessons of life.
